Wednesday, August 31, 2011

The Return of Sickie Dick

Coming soon to a theater near you:

"THE THING THAT
WOULDN'T GO AWAY!"


Bring your barf bag, kiddies!

This morning when doing a search for an image of Dick Cheney I could use for this piece, I received the following disclaimer from the nice folks over at Yahoo:


"Results for Dick Cheney may contain adult oriented content."

I wasn't the least bit surprised to learn this. The man is a walking, talking obscenity.

I have a confession to make. Until he slithered back onto the public stage this week with the release of his so-called "memoirs", I missed Dick Cheney. I missed him and his disgusting daughter Liz, pounding the bejesus out of the talk show circuit, waxing idiotic on the subject of the Big Black Bolshevik Boogie Man in the White House. Be honest; they were kind of fun to watch, weren't they? They always reminded me of two circus wagons stuffed with clowns that had crashed into each other on a two-lane highway. You just couldn't take your eyes off the two of them! Then came the BP disaster. Liz lowered her profile and Sickie Dick all-but-disappeared! I'm sure that's just a coincidence though.

They're back. He as author, she as ghost writer. I am a very happy man this morning. All of the delightful, unintentional humor that the two of them provide is the gift that keeps giving.

It 's next-to-impossible to believe that Dick Cheney could ever have been seen as an asset to any party but the Nazis. Remember back in the day?

In the Spring of 2000, when it appeared certain that Junior had the nomination locked up, George The Elder knew damned well that his idiotic kid could not possibly win based on any intellectual merit, so he picked Cheney to head a committee whose purpose was to find a suitable person to run with him - someone with "gravitas". That was the word of the hour. After only a few days, Cheney marched into the Bush bunker in Kennebunkport with the name of the perfect man for the job - DICK CHENEY! On March 10, 2007 - on this very site - I conjured-up for posterity's sake the dialogue that must have taken place:

CHENEY: George! I have found your ideal running mate!

BUSH: Great! Who is it, Dick?

CHENEY: You're not gonna believe it - IT'S ME!!!

BUSH: Whooa! What're the odds?

Ah, Dubya! And to think that the half-witted little thug was once the "leader of the free world"! Don'cha just love it?

Dick Cheney is back with his "long awaited memoirs". Awaited by whom they won't say. I won't be reading it. I've read enough about it and heard enough about it (primarily from the Dickster's own mouth) to form my own assessment of the drivel spread generously within. In fact I won't be reading any of the flood of books that have been written, are being written, and will be written by the Bush Mob. It's always an amusing thing to watch these bitter, dirty old men attempt to cleanup their putrid little corners in the Hall of Infamy. Robert McNamara tried it fourteen years ago and it didn't work out too well for him. Cheney will fare no better I suspect. What he is attempting here is the equivalent of putting a smiley face on a decomposing pig:

"Well lookie thar, Martha! Ain't that purdy?"

No, I won't be reading any of those books. I'm waiting for the verdict of qualified historians regarding the Bush years, and I imagine it won't be a positive one. Here's a prediction: A century from now the president of the United States will still - on a daily basis - be dealing with the damage these assholes did to this country so long before. Of course that's assuming that the office of the presidency survives that long. Don't bet the farm on that one.

According to those who have had the stomach to read it, a rough outline of the plot would read this way: Richard Bruce Cheney is an honest-to-goodness American hero. During the years 2001 to 2009, If you agreed with him you were on the side of virtue and apple pie. If you didn't you were on the side of the terrorists. It really is as simplistic as that. There are no shades of gray in Dick Cheney's world.

From an interview this week with NBC's Jamie Gangel:

JAMIE GANGEL: People call it torture. You think it should still be a tool?

DICK CHENEY: Yes.

JAMIE GANGEL: Secret prisons?

DICK CHENEY: Yes.

JAMIE GANGEL: Wiretapping?

DICK CHENEY: Well, with the right approval.

JAMIE GANGEL: You say it is one of the things you are proudest of, and you would do it again in a heartbeat.

DICK CHENEY: It was controversial at the time. It was the right thing to do.

"Do it again in a heartbeat"??? Whose heart are they referring to here? His or a normal person's?

I have a feeling that the release of "In My Time", the title of the book, might very well be a preemptive ploy. There's a damned good reason why Dick, George and good ol' Donny Rumsfeld don't dare leave the country these days. According to Colin Powell's former chief-of-st
aff Larry Wilkerson:

"This is a book written out of fear, fear that one day someone will 'Pinochet' Dick Cheney."

Just in case it slipped your memory, the reference he is making is to Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet, who was finally bought to justice for war crimes - years after he lost power. Retirement must not be a very relaxing pastime for Dick Cheney. Wilkerson told Amy Goodman this week that if the former vice-president of the United States is ever bought to trial in the Hague for his crimes against the human race, he would be willing and eager to testify against him. I'd sure as hell hate to be Cheney. The contemptible
freak must sleep with a loaded 357 under his pillow. Can't say that I blame the old bugger.

To tell yo
u the truth, I feel kinda sorry for the guy. It must be difficult not to be able to commit mass murder on a whim after having had that power for eight long years. As bad as the carnage was when he was VP, it might have been much worse.

According to Cheney himself, at a meeting one day, he strongly urged Junior Bush to launch an attack against the sovereign nation of Syria. Hmm! Requesting an extra hour on the White House tennis court was one thing; this was a different matter entirely. Iraq wasn't going too well by that point. Another unprovoked incursion might backfire also. Dubya needed a consensus. He asked for a show of h
ands from a handful of staffers - who just happened to be in the room at that moment - whether or not the VP's idea was a good one. Not a single hand was raised. COWARDS! The president declined. This incident is fascinating for no other reason than the fact that it finally proves that Bush was capable of making the right decision - if only after taking an informal poll - on a matter that should have been a no-brainer. Still, you've got to grab these happy little revelations wherever you find them.

Does he really believe that he will be able to pull a fast one on history? That the ages will view him much in the same way Roosevelt and Churchill are viewed today? Yeah, he probably does. The only thing monumental about this homicidal twit is his arrogance.

I can't wait to watch the rest of Cheney's book tour. Tomorrow he is making an appearance on MSNBC's Morning Joe. Will Lawrence O'Donnell, Al Sharpton and Rachel Maddow be on the panel questioning him? Wouldn't that be a scream? Fate, if you would be so kind....

Tom Degan
Goshen, NY
tomdegan@frontiernet.net

AFTERTHOUGHT
:

Happy birthday to my communist brother Jeff Degan who was born on August 31, 1964, forty-seven years ago today. Get this: Not only did he marry a lovely French woman; not only does he have two gorgeous and brilliant French daughters; he lives in France and actually likes it there! To make matters worse, he has no plans to bring his little girls to America so they can partake in the economic paradise that is the American Dream - not to mention our splendid educational and health care systems. What can I tell you? The guy is an eternal shame to the good name of the Degan family. Bad Jeffrey!

44 Comments:

At 10:27 AM, Blogger charles moore said...

Hi Tom, I can't wait to see how long it will take for Cheney's book to hit the close out table at the Dollar Store.

 
At 11:01 AM, Blogger Catharine said...

Let's all go live in France, shall we? Good column, Tom. I've been intentionally avoiding him on television because he makes my brain throb.

 
At 11:13 AM, Blogger Ellis D., Esq. said...

I'd call Cheney the scum of the Earth but that would be an insult to scum. The Woodstock Nation Party will aggressively prosecute war criminals such as Dickhead Cheney if you folks are smart enough to elect cool hippies into office. See, we have nothing to lose.....we will do our job and not cater to the establishment. We will dismantle the establishment !! Power to the people !! Vote Woodstock Nation Party in 2012 !!

 
At 11:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great column, Tom! I saw him, briefly(because I can't listen to his lies for longer than 2 minutes)on Monday. He looks terrible - does this mean I've been wrong, all this time, about him being a cyborg or was he made up to get a little sympathy?

Mary Eman

 
At 11:45 AM, Blogger Jefferson's Guardian said...

Tom, I believe the ICC in The Hague would be too merciful toward Dick Cheney. Possibly a trial by Iraqi nationals, conducted in Guantanamo, would serve justice in a more appropriate way.

By the way, it sounds like your brother probably got the preponderance of good sense from your mother and father. ;-) I hope he's celebrating his birthday in style and grace, and saluting his good fortune.

Jeff, if you're reading, happy birthday!

 
At 12:59 PM, Anonymous Earl Degan said...

In my lifetime, I never thought we'd have a President and a Congress, mostly Democrats but many Republicans, who were so thoroughly dedicated to destroying our economy and impoverishing the American people. I don't understand it. Many of these same Congresspeople (and the President) did nothing to deserve their own personal wealth. They broker their power; they're corrupt. Yet, let an average person work, use her or his own ideas and sweat to increase their personal wealth, and this Congress and THIS President think that person should pay higher taxes to support the government freeloaders.

Innovation and hard work in a land of freedom and liberty made the United States great. An oppressive government led by economic ignoramuses like President Obama is destroying our country's greatness and leaving a legacy of poverty for our young people.

I will never ever vote for a Democrat again. And there are some Republicans who are equally held in my contempt.

 
At 1:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

@Jefferson's Guardian

merci

 
At 2:05 PM, Blogger Ellis D., Esq. said...

Hey Earl....vote for we hippies. We plan on preserving the COMMONS for WE THE PEOPLE !! We'll start to fix the economy by cutting the Military Industrial Complex taxpayer charity down to just enough to defend OUR borders. The trillions we will save on that will be used for job creation and public assistance while jobs are being created. Minimum wage will be $20 per hour giving a full time worker a gross income of approximately $36,000 per yr. not including mandatory employer health insurance for which employers will be reimbursed through tax credits and the like. So come on board Earl and ride the PEACE TRAIN !!! Vote Woodstock Nation Party in 2012 !!!

 
At 2:39 PM, Blogger Mack Lyons said...

I didn't miss him. In fact, I pretty much forgot about him, as most people tend to do with VPs.

I doubt Cheney's health will last long enough for him to qualify for the Pinochet treatment. Then again, evil men have this thing about living very long lives. Personal religious theory of mine says God's waiting for these bastards to come correct and repent before they kick off. 90% of the time, they never do.

 
At 6:57 PM, Anonymous Earl Degan said...

Ellis D,

I like what you have to say. Lets just print up enough money so that every American, and illegals too, will get 1 million dollars in the mail. None of us will have to work anymore. This will lead to peace and understanding amongst the masses!

I'm just glad there is freedom of ideas here on Tom's blog unlike Dave Dubya's where he controls it like Hugo Chavez! No soup for you (like the Seinfeld Soup Nazi) says Dave W, if you expose any bull in his comments.

 
At 7:10 PM, Anonymous ronni said...

Awesome. Little Dickie is hitting the talk show circuit! I won't buy the book either. He's got lots of money and I don't have time to waste.

 
At 7:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Progressivism is about government control. "The experts" opine about how things "should be controlled and managed". It gives Progressives the rational for their "programs".

Sorry, a lot of the time "the experts" live in the ivory tower (academia) and have no clue about the reality that is actually occuring. Their opining is just a load of crap.

This country has to start listening to the opinions of the "doers" not the "thinkers". It has to listen to the opinions of the people that actually make things work. Not the people in the ivory towers like FDR's and Obama's "brain trust."

 
At 7:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Obama has surrounded himself with ivory tower theoreticians because he is one himself.

Everything that comes from the real world seems to surprise this administration.

From now on we should make all presidential candidates successfully run a hotdog stand for a week to prove they have basic real world competency.

By the end of the week Romney would have 30 profitable stands and Obama would be explaining that his stand failed because of excessive city regulations.

 
At 7:46 PM, Anonymous Dave W said...

lol anon 7:41 pm

obama's hot dog stand would get a government bailout of borrowed money that doesn't yet exist and Romney's 30 profitable stands would be subjected to a DoJ investigation and hounded into unionizing and made to further subsidize obama's failing, lone stand.

Then, the EPA comes in and with no oversight levies enormous fines on the Romney stands, further eroding any possible profit, while looking the other way at obama's stand leaking hot dog juice into the cities sewers.

Then, Romney's now failing stands look at being forced into a government socialized healthcare scam and seriously considers moving his hot dogs and stands to Shanghai, or sell out to Government Hot Dogs Inc. and take his loss and move what wealth he has left overseas. Goodbye America...

 
At 8:14 PM, Blogger Dave Dubya said...

Dead-eye Dick and his fellow fascists are not welcome in the civilized world. Too bad, that means we're stuck with their stench here.

We shall never be a free nation of laws as long as the Bill of Rights shredding war criminals walk free from justice and accountability.

 
At 6:51 AM, Blogger Prairie Waif said...

Why give him a trial? Fill him up with balloons of black heroin and parachute him into Thailand.

I'm sure he'd enjoy their prisons as much as Maher Arar "enjoyed" the stint he did, as a Canadian citizen pulled off a plane in-flight home to wife and children, and shipped to SYRIA of all places.

If we can't airspace over Thailand. We have options in Syria.

 
At 9:43 AM, Blogger Ellis D., Esq. said...

Earl, you are NOT paying attention !! The WNP is not in favor of illegal immigration. In fact the Woodstock Nation Party favors very limited legal immigration. See, until we can take good care of all the folks who belong here outsiders are just shit out of luck. Come on Earl, you know printing money is an establishment capitalist scam and only serves to lessen the value of money and cause goods and services to cost more. By using the Military Industrial Complex money that the establishment so cheerfully pisses away on war and war equipment ( providing absolutely no benefit to anyone but the buddies of the politicians )there will be plenty of money available for workers pay and benefits. By utilizing a RESOURCE BASED economy without artificially created scarcity, there will be plenty to SHARE among WE THE PEOPLE. Yeah Earl getting a FAIR DEAL will lead to peace and understanding among the masses. It is the evil establishment that has no clue about peace and understanding. Dickhead Cheney ( Satan's favorite son ) is a prime example of such an establishment asshole. Vote WNP in 2012 and help change Amerika back into what it should be.....a free democratic nation living in peace and harmony. Is that too much to ask ??

 
At 12:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

STATISM GONE WILD!

WHATS NEXT WITH OBAMA'S FEDERAL FASCISTS?

Last week, heavily armed federal agents raided two guitar manufacturing facilities in Tennessee owned by Gibson — one in Nashville, another in Memphis. The feds were not acting on a tip that an al Qaeda cell was holed up in the buildings; or that Mexican drug cartel gangs were lurking inside. It was actually something far more serious; far more serious, that is, to a bunch of federal bureaucrats with nothing better to do.

The raids were carried out because the Department of Justice and the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service claim that parts of the iconic guitars manufactured in the plants contained the wrong kind of imported wood. And, although the feds have not made clear to Gibson just what it has done wrong, the government appears also to be claiming the guitar parts might have been exported to the U.S. contrary not to American laws, but to certain domestic laws of the countries exporting the parts to the United States!

 
At 12:51 PM, Blogger Ellis D., Esq. said...

Boy I'm glad I already have an SG !!!

 
At 7:20 PM, Anonymous Soupy Sales said...

Ellis D.

Are you saying the WNP will not support a military to defend the USA?

What if a country like Canada decides to take advantage of the situation and invades the US? I know Canada has a small military because they know the US will protect their backs and aren't ashamed of freeloading.

I will vote for the WNP if they pre-emptively invade Canada and seize all their tar sands, wood, and hydroponic pot for US consumption!

- Soupy

 
At 8:12 PM, Blogger Ellis D., Esq. said...

Soupster....I think you must already have good pot. A prior comment of mine clearly states the WNP will have sufficient military strength and means to defend OUR borders. If a foreign nation is foolish enough to attack they will regret it. It's the imperialistic world conquest the WNP will put an end to. These foreign wars piss away tax dollars that are needed for things that are actually important and will make a difference in WE THE PEOPLES' lives. But we are happy to have your vote if you feel inclined Soupy !!

 
At 3:08 AM, Anonymous Flight66 said...

EDE..How do we get the Woodstock Nation Party on the ballot here in Mexifornia?

 
At 8:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The campaign slogan of the WNP:

Pot in every pot.

 
At 9:22 AM, Blogger Ellis D., Esq. said...

Actually the WNP campaign slogan is PEACE, LOVE AND SANITY !! You folks should try it sometime !! We considered POT IN EVERY CHICKEN but that wouldn't be fair to vegetarians !!

 
At 8:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I'll buy a copy, scan it, and post it on every file sharing site I can find. Denying Darth Chaney even a few pennies in royalties would be worth the effort.

 
At 12:19 PM, Anonymous Just the Facts! said...

"Cheney the scum of the Earth but that would be an insult to scum.
war criminals
Dickhead
fill him up with balloons of black heroin and parachute him into Thailand
Satan's favorite son
asshole"

Seems like a lot of effort venting spent on a man who no longer holds any position of elected power.
I guess it's better to do that than face current events showing our President of Hope and Change, Share the Wealth, Yes We Can, Shovel Ready Jobs that were not ready, the complete and utter failure that he and his liberal Keynesian polices are.. Whose only defense for these failures are to blame Bush, or as shown on the blog, blame anyone but the current Commander in Chief.

It seems to me that the facts would show for all the screaming of how rotten "corporatism" is, the liberals fail to see how "command economy" is such a failure that people flee it at risk of their lives to move to the USA and not the other way around.
It's called voting with their feet.

 
At 12:47 PM, Anonymous Dick Cheney said...

Tom Degan, Dave Dubya, Jefferson's Guardian, Anna Van Zana

Liberal utopia lies just around the corner, we will bicycle to work at our green jobs assembling wind mills and solar panels, lunch on tofu and salads, then bicycle back home to our multi family apartment units (no more McMansions).

In summer we will take high speed bullet trains to view the vast national parks and wildlife reserves, though no one will be allowed to depart the trains, less they foul the pure land and waters which are free of man's influence.

At home we will watch PBS television extolling the glories of every culture on Earth, while demonizing our own, or at least our past culture, before the liberals destroyed it.

 
At 1:54 PM, Anonymous Soupy Sales said...

Ellis D,

Maybe I just smoked too much wacky tabacky today but a resource based economy sounds a little far fetched. Why don't we just base a society on the Star Trek replicators? They were originally used to synthesize meals on demand, but were modified to create and recycle objects. We won't have to work and since the replicators can create cannabis based products, there will be peace, love and understanding amongst the people of the new Aquarius based society.


http://www.thevenusproject.com/a-new-social-design/resource-based-economy

The term and meaning of a Resource-Based Economy was originated by Jacque Fresco. It is a system in which all goods and services are available without the use of money, credits, barter or any other system of debt or servitude. All resources become the common heritage of all of the inhabitants, not just a select few. The premise upon which this system is based is that the Earth is abundant with plentiful resource; our practice of rationing resources through monetary methods is irrelevant and counter productive to our survival.

Modern society has access to highly advanced technology and can make available food, clothing, housing and medical care; update our educational system; and develop a limitless supply of renewable, non-contaminating energy. By supplying an efficiently designed economy, everyone can enjoy a very high standard of living with all of the amenities of a high technological society.

A resource-based economy would utilize existing resources from the land and sea, physical equipment, industrial plants, etc. to enhance the lives of the total population. In an economy based on resources rather than money, we could easily produce all of the necessities of life and provide a high standard of living for all.

 
At 2:17 PM, Anonymous Just the Facts! said...

Soupy,

"In an economy based on resources rather than money, we could easily produce all of the necessities of life and provide a high standard of living for all."

I agree it is far fetched. Unless of course I am the "we" who determines what a high standard of living is.

 
At 3:35 PM, Anonymous Soupy Sales said...

Just the Facts!

I agree. A Resource Based Economy sounds too good to be true. I think it is another one of those imaginary liberal utopias which is why I am hesitant to vote for Ellis D's Woodstock Nation Party. All these Utopias make you believe that you can have a high standard of living without having to work for it.

I'm just glad that Tom D. lets us voice our views unlike Dave Dubya's blog where Dave reminds me of the Seinfeld Soup Nazi!

 
At 5:48 PM, Anonymous Just the Facts! said...

Who is Dave Duyba and why should I care?

 
At 8:48 AM, Anonymous Will Shirley said...

Why in the world do these jerks take the time to read your blog and comment when their comments are pretty much always on the same tired insults and trash talk? They could just cut and paste their previous posts and save time. Maybe you should add a series of comments from Anonymous which cover the evil deeds of that Satan worshiping liberal: Obama and his brain trusts which leave America weak and highly taxed. I get tired of listening to them, myself, because they have no logic, just anger and lack of empathy for other humans.

Here's the thing: we seem to be evolving our society into a greed motivated, anger-powered bunch of morons who have no clue on history, nor do they care. They care about very few things but mostly they seem to care about insulting anyone who thinks. For some odd reason they feel that ignorance is bliss and they pursue their bliss to the ends of the earth. It's pathetic reading their poorly written drivel and realizing that these idiots went to public schools and probably graduated high school. Makes me wonder if we are wasting our tax dollars. I can understand why they would attack Tom, he makes them look bad, but they ought to realize that they can do that by sitting down and writing some crap that impresses them but just doesn't make any damn sense. I don't get it.

 
At 10:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who is Will Shirley and why should anyone care?

 
At 10:38 AM, Blogger Tom Degan's Daily Rant said...

Who is Will Shirley? Who the hell are you, if you don't mind me asking. At least Will has the courage to make himself known and doesn't need to post anonymously.

We know who will Shirley is because he has the courage of his convictions - unlike you.

Very sincerely,

Tom Degan

 
At 11:04 AM, Blogger Dave Dubya said...

While trolls are stupidly amusing sometimes, mostly they are not amusing.

 
At 11:20 AM, Blogger Jefferson's Guardian said...

Tom, I'm almost positive that one of the traits or symptoms of schizophrenia is conversation, either verbally or written, with oneself. Certainly, "Anonymi" (AKA Just the Facts!, "Soupy Sales", "Dick Cheney"), and "their" internal conversations, would qualify.

From Wikipedia:

"Schizophrenia is a mental disorder characterized by a disintegration of thought processes and of emotional responsiveness. It most commonly manifests as auditory hallucinations, paranoid or bizarre delusions, or disorganized speech and thinking, and it is accompanied by significant social or occupational dysfunction."

That's our boy!

 
At 11:53 AM, Blogger Kati said...

Hi Tom, glad to make your acquaintance. I followed the link from the NYT.

Thanks for a bit of laughter about Cheney. He used to scare the bejesus out of me and so do all those extreme rightwingers who have managed to take over the mainstream. So it's good to laugh at them...

I'm going to be 69 years old in 8 days and for some reason the smell of fascism in the political air is bringing on a chronic case of PTSD. I was born in 1942 in Budapest in a Jewish family (actually an agnostic one, but that was already illegal way way before the war in Hungary...).

I survived thanks to my mother and Raoul Wallenberg. I dealt with it by studying collective violence in the 13nth century! But now it's getting closer to NOW, if you get my meaning....

I've come to the conclusion that in this supposed Age of Information so many people are more ignorant than 13nth century peasants. Actually, that paradox would be pretty interesting if only it happened on another planet...

 
At 12:14 PM, Blogger Tom Degan's Daily Rant said...

Thank you so much for that, Kati! You honor all of us with your contribution to the discussion.

Yours is a story that needs to be heard. And in case I forget when the day arrives, happy birthday!

All the best,

Tom Degan

 
At 12:17 PM, Blogger Tom Degan's Daily Rant said...

Have a look at Kati's blog, folks. It's great! Here's a link:

http://theflykati-digressions.blogspot.com/

Cheers!

 
At 12:31 PM, Blogger Darlene said...

Cheney's blather on the talk shows just proved my contention that he is a Sociopath.

 
At 9:31 AM, Anonymous Dick Cheney said...

Take a look at all these Hawks within the Democratic Party saying we needed to get rid of Saddam Hussein before the War started!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N5p-qIq32m8

Its too damn funny how Democrats get amnesia and flip flop!

Its all in my book.

 
At 12:23 PM, Blogger Kati said...

Thanks Tom, you're making my head swell. I'm the one most honored to post here..

PS: I deleted my previous post because I made a bit typo booboo!

 
At 12:26 PM, Blogger Tom Degan's Daily Rant said...

No problem, Kati. Please keep those cards and letters coming it!

 
At 1:56 PM, Blogger Jefferson's Guardian said...

The irony that allowed Richard Cheney to become who he did.

Read this.

 

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