Moscow Mitch: Vladimer's Bitch

QUESTION:

Is there a slimier bag of dirt infesting the halls of Congress than Mitch McConnell?
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Asking for a friend.

A naughty title to this piece, I concede; in this age of calumny I am as guilty as anyone, I suppose. God forgive me.
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Loretta and Walter Clements
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I just cannot understand the voters in the state of Kentucky. This is kind of a personal thing for me for the simple reason that generations of my maternal forbears all hail from the Bluegrass state. My grandfather, Walter Clements, was a native of Louisville. He and my grandmother, the former Loretta Doran, today sleep side by side in a little Catholic cemetery not far from the birthplace of Abraham Lincoln. My aunt Marietta Barris also rests in the same plot. Although I haven't traveled there in a fair number of years, there is a soft spot in my heart for that beautiful state.
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That being said, the question is literally screaming to be asked: What the hell is the matter with those silly Kentuckians? How is it that a people, so seemingly sensible and decent-minded on the surface, are able to send a corrupt scoundrel like Mitch McConnell to Washington as their representative - for decades now? Has their water been tainted with some weird chemical cooked up in a laboratory in the basement of Tucker Carlson's home? What gives?
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Six years ago, Mitch's continued insistence on pandering to the demands of the National Rifle Association led me down a very dark corridor of violent fantasy:
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Since extreme violence seems to be the order of the day, might I share with you this insatiable little fantasy of mine? It involves our boy Mitch. You see, I have this dream of beating the distinguished gentleman from Kentucky to a fucking, bleeding pulp. Confronting him in a dark alley somewhere in the District of You-Know-Where, I can visualize pounding his skull to the very edge of existence. Once he got the message, I might then be seriously tempted to set the decrepit old son-of-a-bitch on fire - just to keep things interesting, you understand. But that kind of treatment would be much too harsh and brutal - even for the likes of Mitch McConnell. Just stuff the bruised and bloodied little bastard into a dumpster behind some third-rate pizzeria on K Street, where he can think things over while he recuperates.

From The Rant, 4/9/13
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More calumny, I know, and again, I apologize. At least I concluded that little tirade by saying that I didn't mean it, and that we all should follow the teachings of the Prince of Peace. Being so close to Easter, I thought it the right thing to do. But if the good people of the great state of Kentucky are unable to comprehend the complete and total evil that is their senior senator, I'm afraid there's no helping them. Three years ago, America's electoral process was subverted by a hostile foreign power. One would think that any senator who professes to love America as much as Mitch says he does would want to see that something so atrocious never happens again. Not Mitch! He knows the election was corrupted three years ago, and he's dead set on it's being corrupted again in 2020. Three years ago, he tried to move heaven and earth to make sure that the American people were kept in the dark about Russian interference in our elections, and he nearly succeeded. Thank goodness for Fake News.
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Mitch McConnell is closer to being a Mafia Don then to being a statesman. If this is what the majority of the people of Kentucky consider to be adequate representation, God help them all. He's a walking, talking atrocity.
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It is my belief that one day Mitch will finally be exposed and punished severely for his crimes against the people of the United States, but waiting for that day is damned-near excruciating.

Mitch McConnell is an example of what happens when a country's political dialogue is dumbed-down to the point of insanity. He is what the people of the state of Kentucky - and We the People as a whole - precisely deserve. Enjoy your stay in Idiot Nation. Don't drink the water.
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Tom Degan

Goshen, NY
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SUGGESTED READING:
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Here are Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert's take on the disgusting phenomenon of Mitch McConnell on a recent installment of CBS's Late Show:
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICnUJl0t0Xw
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It's a keeper!

Jon and Mitch in happier days